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"Do you take cages?"

"Cages?"

"Bird cages?"

"Oh ,yes we do. I am sorry has your budgie died?" (nobody can accuse me of not being empathetic with a pet owner's pain)

"Oh no, I bought it for my Mum didn't I because I thought it would keep her company as she lives on her own but from the day she got him she says he has never shut up and it is driving her mad"

"Isn't that what they are supposed to do - talk?"

"She said it wasn't saying any proper words, just chirping away as if it was cross all the time ( kept quiet at this point. I have absolutely no experience of cross budgies and didn't feel I had much to contribute) and she didn't want it anymore. So I have brought its cage and lots of other bits and pieces that we got for its cage"

Now, reader, I think I can safely say that this budgie has made a big mistake in getting on the wrong side of this family. There was so much stuff in that cage in the way of bells, ladders, swings etc. it was like Centre Parcs for budgies. There was even a plastic budgie which I admit did give me a start when I first saw it as I thought it was the budgie itself! I think this might be what upset the real budgie - a rather attractive looking budgie already in position on the perch who never even acknowledged his presence. I think I might get cross myself.


I tentatively asked after the whereabouts of the budgie but it is now apparently back with the breeder. That will teach him.

Oh for goodness sake . .

Saw this advertising hoarding outside a tea shop in Stockbridge - home of the chattering classes of Edinburgh.

Where to start?? Okay - why is the word "tea" in inverted commas? Is tea not a normal word that it needs to be accorded quotation marks.?

Reader, I know that you will be way ahead of me in shouting "Why is there an apostrophe in Tea's Coffee's " ? It wouldn't be so wrong if the idiot sign writer at least got it consistently wrong and stuck an apostrophe in the scones and muffins!

And what exactly does "etc" cover in a coffee shop?

What is so worrying is the care they have taken over the squiggly bits in the corner - idiots!

Football's Coming home . . . .

.....and so is the England team! Too many egos- not enough talent. (Yes who knew that yours truly had turned into a football pundit??)

Thank goodness that Germany scored zillions of goals or else we would never have heard the last of England's second disallowed goal which (allegedly) went over the line.

Never mind, now Christine Bleakley can tell Frank all about her exciting new job !

Wildlife in the city

Saw this guy sitting on the banks of the Water of Leith down at Canonmills. Who says you have to be in the country to see great wildlife??

"You cannot be serious..."

Wimbledon must be awarded the prize for the most uncomfortable dress code for linesmen and umpires. I ask you button up shirt and ties and long sleeve blouses in this heat - are they mad? The court officials at the French and US Open look like they belong on a tennis court with their shorts and short sleeved tops. That is what you would expect to see on a tennis court right? Not at Wimbledon , they are clinging to the "extras from a P.G.Wodehouse novel" look and boy do they look uncomfortable.

Fair play to the design company though for pulling a fast one - nothing appeals more to the Wimbledon Committee obviously than living in the past.

"So then I said...."

Met this fella on the path along to Dunstanburgh Castle just outside Craster last week. Not at all bothered by us being there and even posed for pictures!

Had a great couple of days in Northumberland. Weather very sunny - I got the sunburn to prove it!

Off to Northumberland - hooray!!

The sun is shining and I will not be blogging for a few days as we are off to Northumberland and our lovely bed and breakfast. If someone would arrange for Northumberland to become part of Scotland, then it would almost be my favourite place ( my first allegiance must always be to the East Neuk of Fife, you would expect no less from a Dunfermline girl!)

I love the huge skies and the endless beaches and of course Barter Books in Alnwick, the only bookshop I know where there are bowls of water for dogs who like to browse!

A vuvuzela too far

A trumpet that only blows one note and is wielded by several thousand people at once. The South Africans are not stupid are they, I could see the wretched "vuvuzela" being their secret weapon in this World Cup.



I would strongly suggest that all players are supplied with 2 Anadin Extra Strength before they go out to play - I don't think that they are on the list of banned substances but maybe someone who gives a toss might like to check!

Mary, Mary quite contrary, how does your garden grow?

"Coffee - garden - coffee. Does a morning need anything else ?"

Betsy Garmon

Feed the Birds , tuppence a bag (in your dreams Mary Poppins, more like £1.35!!!)

Don't get me wrong, I love these feathered little critters and I think it is one of the great miracles of Ma Nature that they were basically inside an egg the size of a Cadbury's Mini egg just a few weeks ago. But boy, can they pack away the birdseed!

Poor husband has two full time jobs at the moment. The one that keeps me in the manner to which I am accustomed , and his other one keeping the bird feeders full. We have a family of sparrows in the garden and now that they have "fledged", - can I just say I am sure that is not a proper word but one made up by the BBC Springwatch team, however I digress - it is like having a gang of marauding teenagers in the garden. Mum and Dad are obviously thinking that their job is done and it is down to the two softies in whose garden they have taken up residence to keep the little uns fed.

Mark you, at the risk of turning them into Disney characters, they are cute. Yesterday, they learned that they could somehow cling on sideways to the leylandi hedge and that game kept them amused for ages. One of the cockier ones was leading the way, landing and then flying off in a "that's how to do it way" - note to him by the way nobody likes a smart ass sparrow! One of the little girl sparrows (that cannot be a proper bird term can it?) was a bit more cautious, nothing wrong with that, but she soon got the hang of it although she tired of it quicker than her brother - better things to do with her time I suppose!

Anyway, can I leave you with this thought dear reader from the great lady herself aka Mary Popppins and can I advise that you take a minute now to go and get a box of tissues first .......

"Come feed the little birds, show them you care

And you'll be glad if you do,

Their young ones are hungry, their nests are so bare

All it takes is tuppence from you........"

It's a Jungle Out there . . .

For those of you who don't know this fantastic character , may I introduce you to Mr Monk, one of the greatest detective characters ever devised for television.

Like Columbo, he is from the "village idiot" end of the personality spectrum as far as the rest of the world is concerned but do not be fooled! He is a brilliant detective who "lost his soul" the night his beloved wife Trudi was murdered and which left him with more anxieties than are known to the whole of the medical profession. However, with the help of his devoted assistant Natalie and his boss Captain Shuttlemeyer ( two of the kindest people in tellyland!) he lives his life best he can solving seemingly unsolvable crimes along the way with his combination of brilliant mind - and Zen like hand movements. (can't explain, you would have to see it!)

Actor Tony Shaloub has won many accolades for the portrayal as "Mr Monk" including a Golden Globe award, Emmy awards and two Screen Actors Guild Awards - he is absolutely brilliant.

New Spectacles

Have at last chosen my new specs - honestly,how stressful is that?? I reckon that must be right up there along with moving house and divorce.

Decided early on that the black framed "geek" look was doing me no favours and , despite my contempt for all things "designer" have ended up with a pair of Givenchy (who knew that Givenchy made specs - they make perfume don't they????) oblong, semi rimless and "with an air of French elegance" - their words not mine!

Having almost worked myself into a state of gibbering indecision I was then called upon to pick my "free" second pair so I opted for sunglasses. I laughingly said to the 12 year old assistant,

"Oh I will stay away from those huge round ones , don't want to end up looking like Cheryl Cole"

and was met with a sardonic look (at least as sardonic as a Boots Optical assistant can be!) which clearly conveyed that there was about as much chance of me being taken for Cheryl Cole as England have of winning the World Cup.. See how I cleverly brought in the football connection there - reader, this blog is not just thrown together you know.

Anyway, will see if anyone notices my new "air of French elegance" - won't hold my breath!

Tongue tied

Okay - so I have been dragged kicking and screaming, sorry that should be encouraged, into the world of the blogsphere and now find myself having to impart pithy comments.
Firstly, big thanks to my ever so talented IT instructor this afternoon who helped me to set up this blog. Endlessly patient even when having to repeat

"No, double click" and "its really easy once you get the hang of it",in an encouraging tone!


By the time I was finished I felt ready for a wee sherry and a lie down in a darkened room, but now I have given myself a sharp slap around the legs and a good talking to and so here goes............



This is a bit like when I play Spotify on the computer ( oh yes, I can do "spotify"!!!) and I am faced with every tune ever composed to choose from and I end up going for Dolly and Kenny giving it their all in "Islands in the Stream". Well you have to choose something you can sing along with and I just love the bit when Dolly comes in and everyone claps. Yes - go and listen to it now I know you want to.